LGBTQ

Lil Nas X opens up about suicidal thoughts and teenage gay shame in powerful new video

Lil Nas X visits his teenage self in an emotional music video for his new single “Sun Does Down”. (YouTube/Lil Nas X)

Lil Nas X dropped his “Sun Goes Down” video – and it’s an emotional one.

Everyone’s new favourite pop icon has been teasing the “important” song for a few days, and upon its release fans were blown away by its introspective lyrics and moving music video.

The guitar-laced track sees Lil Nas X recalling how he was “haunted” by “these gay thoughts” and would pray to God to “take it from me”.

“Send me a gun and I’ll see the sun,” he sings in the chorus – ultimately realising: “I’m happy by the way / That I made that jump, that leap of faith.

“I’m happy that it all worked out for me / I’ma make my fans so proud of me.”

The “Sun Goes Down” video shows Lil Nas X visiting his teenage self, who is struggling with loneliness and his identity, working at a Taco Bell, stanning Nicki Minaj and taking classes at high school.

The clip, which was directed by Nas alongside Psycho Films, concludes with him offering support and love to his younger self, who then proceeds to dance joyously at his prom.

Fans were in agreement that “Sun Goes Down” is both an emotional gut punch and a certified bop.

One fan shared that listening to the song made them experience “repressed memories of queerphobia”.

For many queer people, the lyrics “hit a little too close to home”.

Even Taco Bell tweeted about “Sun Goes Down”, saying it had the track “currently on repeat”.  Nas responded: “we want the lil nas x meal”. And yes.

Lil Nas X will be the musical guest for this weekend’s Saturday Night Live finale. He’ll appear on the show alongside The Queen’s Gambit actress Anya Taylor-Joy, who will be hosting, and will perform both “Sun Goes Down” and “Montero”.

“Sun Goes Down” is the second single Lil Nas X has released this year, following March’s “Montero (Call Me By Your Name)” and its mythology-inspired video that will live on in internet infamy.

Suicide is preventable. Readers who are affected by the issues raised in this story are encouraged to contact Samaritans on 116 123 (www.samaritans.org), or Mind on 0300 123 3393 (www.mind.org.uk). ​

Readers in the US are encouraged to contact the National Suicide Prevention Line on 1-800-273-8255.

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