Beloveds, on Sunday night Patti LaBelle and Gladys Knight reunited on stage as part of the popular Instagram series Verzuz and that whirring sound you hear is me vibrating on a higher, more sanctified frequency ever since. Thanks so much for all the fair-to-middlin’ times on Earth but my new permanent address is The Glinting Light from Purple Chandeliers from Gladys and Patti’s Verzuz. I live here now; make a right at Patti LaBelle’s Stack of Louis Vuitton Luggage Way and you’ll find me.
Apple
Verzuz, a “battle” series that pairs musical artists and challenges them to go song-for-song with each other for dominance, only started in April but has quickly gained millions of followers and a central position in cultural conversations. What started out, by necessity, as two artists meeting only virtually through the magic of a sometimes-glitchy IG Live has expanded to in-studio meetings without audiences for the likes of Brandy and Monica, and now has achieved its final form: a revival held at the Grand Ballroom of the Wakanda Commons East.
The event may have aired at 8 p.m., but they were having 11 a.m. Sunday morning Church, with a capital C. And yes, it feels almost blasphemous to say what we witnessed on IG Live was Church—the Holy Ghost ain’t in the habit of making green circle Close Friends posts. But make no mistake: what Ms. Gladys and Ms. Patti brought to the people was some kind of holy. The two made mention of their combined 150 years of performance experience (Patti started in her teens; Gladys was out here belting at four years old), and every minute of that was on display as they elevated a battle to a gift. By mixing humility, gratitude, awe, and old-fashioned star dazzle, Patti and Gladys gave a master class in performance and a master class in understanding the assignment (and getting extra credit even though you already passed the course, and the boards, and… actually, didn’t you write this assignment?)
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You know that thing where you invite a glamorous older adult in your life, say a beloved auntie, to a function and she says “I’ll bring dessert” and you say, “No, I’ve got it covered” and you can feel her eyes narrow over the phone as she asks “Who made it? Actually, never mind; don’t even tell me. I’ll bring my pie.” That was Gladys Knight and Patti LaBelle showing up at The Diva Holodeck and Emporium being told they just needed to sit regally, talk about their music, and listen to up to 90 seconds of their songs played by an unseen DJ. What we got instead was a full spontaneous concert performance of hit after hit. These women, midway through their 70s but looking and moving better than me, graduated from shoulder shimmies and high notes hit sitting down like they were the climax of the “I Will Always Love You” music video to Gladys Knight leaping to her feet to belt and cutting a rug like she was gunning for another Dancing With the Stars trophy and Patti LaBelle kicking her stilettos off during “Over the Rainbow” and giving us the full “if a teeny weeny bird can flyyyyy” dance. These women weren’t just here to grace us with a friendly competition, they were trying to win a Tony. And they succeeded. I, Antoinette Perry, hereby bestow them with two Tonys! That just happened!
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What’s remarkable about this Verzuz is that it gave us a glimpse into the mindsets and the decades-long friendship that these women have while also putting their superhuman work ethic on full display, as if there was ever a shade of doubt. None of this would have been possible in the same way in a more programmed format. While your Kennedy Center Honors and NAACP Image Award presentations are wonderful, none of them give the kind of unfettered (got to be) realness that we were treated to when Gladys and Patti just sat down without a script, without an agenda, and with nothing to prove and started talking. To wit, the whole thing started with the two of them walking on stage, sitting down, and complaining about how hot it was, then talking to each other off mic for a bit, before someone let them know they were actually live. Meanwhile, I’m in my house screaming at the TV “Let them be! I’ll just sit over here and mind my business while grown folks talk!”
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When they finally did deign to pick up the microphones (again, totally optional, but much appreciated) they spent a good 20 minutes catching up like old friends, talking about their gratitude for their careers and specifically thanking me by name (well, Patti LaBelle said, “Thank you gay people,” but as soon as this LegalZoom name change goes through, that’ll be me). The conversation had a deeply familiar and unadorned feeling, which was particularly charming and ironic juxtaposed with the set, particularly Gladys’s gold-plated rose and Patti’s stack of luggage topped with no less than three pairs of red bottoms. They covered such reliable Diva Auntie conversation staples as “What a blessing all of this is”, “How long we’ve known each other”, “People who have passed”, “RECIPES!”, “My kids, your kids, how is everybody?”, “I don’t really do the internet”, and, of course, “Michelle Obama (and how proud we are of her)”. For much of the first hour, the Verzuz felt like sitting in the middle seat between two old coworkers who didn’t realize they were going to be on the same flight. Which is to say, perfect. Patti LaBelle casually asking “Did I tell you Shirley Caesar called?”, referring to the first lady of gospel, is a moment I have no right to witness but am grateful to have ear-hustled my way into. Patti LaBelle trying to get Gladys Knight to remember the name of a little girl she sang with during the Clinton administration is a moment most pleasing in my eavesdropping career. Patti LaBelle talking about how she didn’t know what the French lyrics in “Lady Marmalade” meant and Gladys Knight replying “Well, I took a bit of French” is the reason that conversation was invented. They could have just talked forever.
But then when the singing started, baby, it was as if singing had never begun until that very minute. Gladys and Patti were hitting notes, seated, that matched the recordings from 30, 40 years ago playing behind them. When you talk about vocal quality! Black don’t crack also refers to vocal cords, apparently. But even in that they were humble, with Gladys Knight mentioning more than once the need to lower the key for songs. Ma’am, you are a legend. Put the key in the basement and we’ll meet you there. The key is Atlantis and we thank you. Patti, meanwhile, was reunited with her old nemesis: the person who turned the cue cards at the “Where are my background singers” Christmas tree lighting. At least that’s who I assume was in charge of the TelePrompTer, which both divas and special guest Dionne Warwick called out. “These songs are 20 years old,” Gladys Knight exclaimed, “I don’t know these words!”
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Despite the brief run-in with LaBelle’s foe, if they hadn’t said anything about the lyrics or the key or any other thing they might have been sensitive about, we wouldn’t have known. Watched by half a million people on Instagram Live and surely as many if not more on Apple Music, this Verzuz was an elevation of the form—a masterclass in grace, longevity, and talent; a generous donation to the Foundation for GIF Excellence, and yet another affirmation of the healing power of Black artistry.
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