Nikki Glaser has been widely praised for her turn as host of the 2025 Golden Globes on Sunday night, during which she roasted the celebrities in attendance without crossing the line. While chatting with Howard Stern on the morning after, our 2024 Comedian of the Year revealed some of the jokes that were left on the cutting room floor.
Ranging from a second Diddy joke to a Hitler mention to a dig at Alec Baldwin, Glaser shared the pitches for jokes that she knew she couldn’t say on CBS and so they were earmarked for the “Stern file.”
One of the jokes, “This is the last time all of you will be in the same room together until the Diddy trial,” was cut in favor of another Diddy mention because they decided there could only be one.
Another would have built on her joke about “two-time Holocaust survivor” Adrien Brody for appearing in two Holocaust movies, quipping if the actor “could go back in time, he would thank baby Hitler for his career.”
Though Glaser “loved” the latter joke, her Gen Z assistant didn’t get it and so she realized, “We’re going to lose a whole generation on that joke, and then I’ve said ‘Hitler’ for nothing.’”
There was also a different line about Joker 2 in which she would’ve said the film “reminded me of when the first Joker came out and I was in the theaters and I was afraid someone was going to shoot it up. And then during Joker 2, I was really hoping they would.”
She also considered, “Glen Powell is nominated tonight for Hit Man. Who would have thought you’d only be the second-hottest hit man in America?” However, Glaser felt that meme had run its course.
There was also a dig at the Alec Baldwin Rust shooting: “Michael Keaton was so great in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. And Alec Baldwin sadly did not come back to play a ghost because he was too busy making them.” (In that case, Glaser thought it was “a great joke,” but concluded it was “just too mean.”)
Glaser also admitted to flubbing a Ben Affleck joke in which she said, “Wicked, Queer, Nightbitch — these are not just words Ben Affleck yells after he orgasms.” As originally written, “it was supposed to be ‘when he orgasms’ and I said ‘after’ and it really bugged me.”
See more of the jokes that Glaser left out below, in which she takes cracks at Matt Gaetz, Nicole Kidman, Nicolas Cage, Kate Winslet, Leonardo DiCaprio, and more.
— The film Anora is nominated for four awards tonight. It’s been called the most unflinching look at sex work since Matt Gaetz’s payment history.
— The Wild Robot is nominated tonight. And by that, I mean Nicole Kidman after two white wines.
— Nicolas Cage is here tonight looking well-rested after a night of sleeping in Elvis’ coffin.
— Only Murders in the Building is amazing. I think it’s so cool that legends like Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Meryl Streep are still at it. It just goes to show you that you’re never too old to still need money.
— Denzel Washington is here. The only thing that has convinced more middle-aged men they could pull off an earring than Denzel Washington is cocaine. Kate Winslet is a lot like cocaine. She’s white. She’s always with Leonard DiCaprio, and I can’t wait to find her at the afterparty tonight.
— Amy Adams is nominated for her performance in Night Bitch, while I was totally snubbed for my performance in Day Slut.
— Daniel Craig is nominated for his performance in Queer, which is a movie and not just what my uncle Chuckie calls Wicked.
— Squid Games is a show where people starve themselves while ruthlessly competing for the ultimate prize. Oh, wait, no, sorry that’s this show.