As Joe Biden was sworn in as president of the United States on Wednesday, the nation—nay, the world—heaved a great sigh of relief. Though the country remains in the throws of numerous crises, we were finally rid of the unhinged, coup-inciting lunatic who’s terrorized millions of people for the last four years. Also probably feeling as though a great weight had been lifted from their shoulders: Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner’s Secret Service detail, who we learned earlier this month were forced to work under outrageous conditions wherein they had to run around town desperately looking for a toilet when nature called because the couple wouldn’t let the people protecting them use any one of the six and a half bathrooms in their Kalorama home. Unfortunately, though, it turns out that Javanka’s plumbing reign of terror may not have ended when Donald Trump stopped being president.
The Washington Post reports that in his last days in office, Trump “issued a directive” extending Secret Service protection to 14 of his family members who would not automatically receive it after his departure. While federal law allows Trump, Melania, and their 14-year-old son, Barron, to continue to receive full-time protection, it did not cover his other children and their families. But Trump wanted everyone to be covered and ordered an extra six months of taxpayer-funded 24-hour security for Ivanka Trump, Jared Kushner, and their three children; Donald Trump Jr. and his five kids; and Eric Trump, Lara Trump, and Tiffany Trump.
Anyway, hopefully Ivanka and Jared can find it in their hearts to allow the agents continuing to protect them to use one of their bathrooms wherever they end up living, which would be both the right thing to do from a basic human standpoint and also avoid taxpayers having to shell out an extra $3,000 a month for use of a toilet. Or not! The Trump Family Grift remains strong.
More Great Stories From Vanity Fair
— Jared and Ivanka’s Final Chapter in Washington Demolished Their Future
— After a Day of Violence, Trump’s Allies Are Jumping Ship
— The Unbearable Whiteness of Storming the Capitol
— Gary Cohn Is a Test Case for Trying to Wash Off the Trump Stink
— The Deeply Unsettling, Not Entirely Surprising Images of Trump’s Capitol Hill Mob
— Twitter Finally Muzzling Trump Is Too Little, Too Late
— The Eerie Charlottesville Echoes of Trump Supporters’ Capitol Coup
— From the Archive: Inside the Cult of Trump, His Rallies Are Church and He Is the Gospel
— Not a subscriber? Join Vanity Fair to receive full access to VF.com and the complete online archive now.